


A Moment of Truth

by IgnobleBard



Category: Merlin (BBC)
Genre: Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-30
Updated: 2010-12-30
Packaged: 2017-10-14 06:12:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/146234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IgnobleBard/pseuds/IgnobleBard
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin considers telling Arthur his secret.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Moment of Truth

No, not today,” Arthur said as Merlin reached to help him with his armor. “Put on your own.”

Merlin put on his greaves, fumbling a bit with a strap. It was so much different putting these things on yourself rather than someone else and he was nervous. Not because of the upcoming battle but because of the words of his childhood friend Will, who said Arthur would no longer be his friend if he learned of his powers. Merlin knew Arthur wasn’t the type to let his father’s laws and intractable personality prevent him from acting on principle. They may have gotten off to a rocky start, he and Arthur, but now they were friends. At least he was reasonably certain Arthur considered him a friend. Had he not come to offer his sword in defense of Merlin's home village, and in defiance of his father’s edict?

Arthur took his arm and buckled the greave for him, then clapped him on the shoulder and gave him a reassuring smile. The prince of Camelot helping him into his armor, what would Uther say if he saw this? Never mind. Merlin knew the answer to that as well. In fact, if Uther found out Arthur had come to help him, Merlin was certain they would both be subject to the king’s wrath.

"You ready?" Arthur asked.

"My throat's dry."

"Me too."

Arthur held out his hand and Merlin paused only a second before clasping it in kind.

"It's been an honor," Arthur said, and Merlin could see he truly meant it.

Not only had Arthur come to aid the besieged village, he had been training the people to fight as well, working tirelessly and patiently with the farmers, most of whom had never even picked up a weapon to hunt. And he had brought an extra suit of mail, the mail Merlin was wearing now. No knight would risk the weight of extra mail when traveling without good reason and Merlin felt pleased and honored that Arthur was so concerned for his safety.

So why not tell him his secret? Will was wrong. Arthur would not turn away from him if he knew. . . would he?

“Whatever happens out there today please don't think any differently of me,” he said.

“I won't. It’s all right to be scared, Merlin,” Arthur replied, misunderstanding him as always.

“That’s not what I meant.” He smiled to think that Arthur sought to comfort him, as though he was a novice warrior under Arthur’s command and not merely a servant. But his smile faded as he turned to face Arthur and saw the expectant look on his face.

“Then what is it?” Arthur asked.

Merlin hesitated.

“If you've got something to say, now is the time to say it,” Arthur encouraged.

Merlin looked at Arthur, standing armored and ready to take on a fight that was not his. The very ideal of a knight of Camelot. Arthur was not only a friend but a fine man as well, a prince worthy to be a king. Yes, he could tell Arthur his secret. Arthur was a man of honor, he would not turn from him, would not turn him in. He could tell Arthur anything. . . and make him live the lie he must live each day, make him hide from Uther, face the constant risk of discovery, and relinquish his honor and duty to Camelot in the bargain.

Yet if Arthur was to see him use his powers, if he were to realize Merlin had betrayed their friendship through keeping his abilities secret then he might no longer consider him a friend. There was no doubt that Arthur finding out would change their relationship, no matter how it happened that he found out. So which would be better for Arthur, to hear it from him or to find out in the heat of battle?

His mind made up, Merlin braced himself to speak.

“Arthur, they’ve crossed the river.”

They turned to see Morgana standing in the doorway. Arthur hastened out and Merlin hung behind, his decision made for him. He drew his sword and followed, to whatever end.


End file.
